In Search Of: The Perfect Swimsuit

Miraclesuit Swimsuit Review

The time has come, I need a proper swimming costume. Not a sunbathing-friendly bandeau or anything with cut outs, but one that can navigate the rigours of a trip to Centreparcs and a waterslide called The Typhoon. A swimsuit that can withstand being shot out of a water tunnel at speeds of up to 45km per hour without any accidental flashing of my typhoon to nearby spectators.

Though practicality is the main requirement I would really, really like it to look good too, if at all possible. I do not enjoy a swimsuit. Frump central. They make me feel extremely Mumsy, and while that might be the reality I am not quite ready to throw in the (beach) towel. Not that I want a swimming costume that is sexy, God no, but I also wouldn’t want it to be unsexy either, just some sort of stylish middle ground. Sporty, maybe. I don’t really want people to look at me in my swimsuit, but I would quite like the woman in the adjacent raft on the Tropical Cyclone to ask me where it’s from. You know?

Well. In excellent news I think I have found it. The perfect swimsuit. One that fits every requirement. Chic but secure. Black, obviously. While I’m not adverse to patterned swimwear, so often the placement of the print is a bit questionable and you find yourself with a giant flower hovering above your unmentionables.

Miraclesuit Swimsuit Review AzuraMiraclesuit SwimwearMiraclesuit Swimsuit Reviews UK

It’s a Miraclesuit Swimsuit, a brand I’ve been curious to try despite the OTT name and the fairly ludicrous claim on the label – Look 10 pounds lighter in 10 seconds! While the feminist in me isn’t entirely happy with this marketing strategy I can concede that the Slightly Smoothersuit doesn’t have quite the same ring to it.

Does make everything a bit smoother though. Yippee. Without being an absolute workout to get on and off in the manner of Spanx et al. I love it. You don’t see this sort of design detail at M&S do you? I want to call it sports luxe. And did you see? Cutouts. Who you calling Mumsy now?

Miraclesuit Swimwear Review UK

Miraclesuit Illusionist Azura Swimsuit, £143.95, from here. Swimsuit gifted by UK Swimwear. All opinions are my own.

Til next time,



  1. Anonymous
    February 12, 2019 / 7:52 am

    Love this swimsuit 😍

  2. Gemma Walker
    February 12, 2019 / 8:15 am

    So far from mumsy. Swimsuit envy!

  3. Anonymous
    February 12, 2019 / 8:25 am

    Love this, looks sturdy but stylish. Exactly what you were after!

    • February 12, 2019 / 8:27 am

      It has been tested on several flumes but we have yet to brave The Typhoon! H x

      • Anonymous
        February 12, 2019 / 3:30 pm

        Jealous of the Typhoon!!! Trina x

  4. February 12, 2019 / 8:41 am

    love it. its the ultimate. A swimsuit that can take on typhoon and you don’t look like you are also about to swim the Channel! sportsworthy but not sporty.

    • February 12, 2019 / 11:35 am

      Just got to pluck up the courage to actually go on the typhoon now! H x

  5. Anonymous
    February 12, 2019 / 9:28 am

    That swimsuit looks like the one! A spoil myself birthday present I think. Stylish and practical, non frumpy and super slimming. Thanks H! Love the commentary too x

    • February 12, 2019 / 11:34 am

      It is super slimming, I’m so impressed with it. H x

  6. Kairen Larsen
    February 20, 2019 / 8:41 pm

    That swimsuit looks great. Stylish and sporty!

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